A Sign of Perfect Peace

Today morning, something very different happened, something that never happened before in the past few months. I woke up with so much happiness and enthusiasm! I literally jumped out of my bed ready to conquer the whole world. I felt so much strength in my arms. My heart felt as light as a feather.

What was so strange about today? Did my worries evaporate away? Did my problems vanish completely? Did my life become easier?

Well, NO.

I just felt a sense of "Perfect Peace" within my heart and I could feel happiness in every cell of my body. I remember, last night, I had slept off with a little prayer. "I give everything into your hands, Lord. Take care of me. Help me do your will." 

Was it the effect of the prayer? I was thinking about it, while I walked around my room. How good it would be if this perfect peace remains in my heart continually, I mused. I knelt down, prayed, felt even stronger. I walked into the kitchen.

My mother had just made me a cup of coffee. It picked it up, took little sips and walked out. It was such a perfect blend, I enjoyed every drop of it as I crossed my house. I went out to the veranda. I could see my father watering the garden. The golden rays of the morning sun hit those tiny water drops on the leaves that glittered like little golden balls. I was mindlessly sipping my coffee when a glimmering light caught my eye. On the grill that separated the veranda and the garden, between two rods, was a fine thread of gold.

I went close and saw a spider web. "Nice," I thought and looked away. In a sudden jerk, I turned to the web once again and this time I examined it very carefully and with a lot of wonder. In the midst of a beautifully spun web was a little white spider. There was something strange about this one. It was perfect. Not even a single strand was broken. It was in perfect condition and it was glittering in the morning sun. (You can see the pictures below. Some strands are not seen because the camera could not capture some very thin strands if the angle to light exposure was different.)

It was quite strange because I have never seen an intact web ever before on that grill because the leaves nearby or the water from the garden hose invariably would damage it. For that matter, I have never come across such an intact web anywhere before! I went running to pick my camera and I clicked off lot of pics. And when I was totally into my camera and macro lenses, I heard a little voice whisper...

"If I will keep the spider web intact and perfect, won't I care more for you?"

This is my sign of a perfect and perfecting peace that has taken root in my heart. 

I wish to share this little sign with someone out there who needs it.

 I wish it would put a smile on someone too.

The spidey! F/5.6 | 1/160s | ISO 200 | Canon 550D Abialbon Paul

The perfect web! F/5.6 | 1/200s | ISO400 | Canon 550D Abialbon Paul

Sign of perfect peace! F/5.6 | 1/200s | ISO 400 | Canon 550D Abialbon Paul

Happiness is My Ambition: End of 2k12 post!

Well, this year, 2012, has had both joyful moments and not-so-joyful moments. To be honest, there were many-a-times tearful moments that tested my heart's capacity to hope. Indeed, life is made beautiful with all these emotions giving colour to our mundane lives and building up our character and strength.

But happiness is a choice ! And it is up to us to CHOOSE it ! 
No matter what life brings our way, we need to understand that our evanescent lives are not to be wasted sitting around a corner and eating our grief. We need to rise up, create our own happiness and even better share it.

Here are some of what I found would help me create happiness !

1. Happiness is found in company of friends

Sometimes you may have to search for solitude and reflect upon your lives. But largely, being in a company of good friends puts a spirit of happiness in your heart, makes you feel loved and accepted.

2. Happiness is found in helping a fellow soul

Giving is more blessed than receiving. By helping others, we create in ourselves a sense of joy and security. It builds up faith and hope in humanity.

3. Happiness is found on becoming a child again

Chasing bubbles, playing with pets dogs and cats, running around with laughter, a sweet smile of innocence...

4. Happiness is found in communicating with your loved ones

Nothing can be more sweet !

5. Happiness is found in love

And love is found everywhere, if you've got the eyes to see it. Brotherly love, sisterly love, parental love, love for our friends. LOVE makes this world go round. And it still does, even after Dec 21, 2012.


6. Happiness is found in the work you love

Now that's me :-p


7. Happiness if found in your achievements

However great or small, your achievements make you fell good, build your self esteem, and earn respect.

8. Happiness if found in relaxing & reflecting

Take a break and care for yourself too.

9. Happiness is found in nature

A sunrise/ A sunset can make the your day !

10. Happiness is found in fighting the despair

Everyday you won't return home from work with a feeling of achievement. Everyday won't trun out to be the best of days. Certain days turn out to be bad, some worse. Fighting the odds of life and staying firm in hope put back happiness.

Wish you a very happy & productive new year, 2013. 
Thank you.

Comments welcome !

Happiness is what we choose...what we create ! 

Of Value? or Of Success?

“Try not to become a man of success rather try to become a man of value.” –Albert Einstein

Everyone wants to be successful. Very true.

But what is success? Whom do you consider successful ?

What "SUCCESS" means to you is largely determined by the society and the media's influence on you. You might feel that a person who owns a three bed-roomed mansion, a BMW car and all the other luxuries of life, earning 2 lakh/month as the most successful person. Or you might consider that a person who is popularized by the media and famous all around the globe as successful. A top rated-popstar. A CEO of a successful company. A top notch computer programmer. Whatever!

What about a high school chemistry teacher in a small town? - Are you kidding?
The society by large would consider that person as "middle class" or probably a little more than middle class if his salary is good or if he has good ancestral property.

Now let me introduce to you, Mr. Vishwakumar. To those who don't know about him, he's a Chemistry teacher in a private school (Petit Seminaire) in Pondicherry. He was my teacher.

He is a simple person. He teaches Chemistry at school. He also teaches Chemistry and Physics in the evenings at his house for very nominal fees. Now what is great about him???
Well, ask anyone! Anyone inside Petit Seminaire School, any past pupil of that school, any parent of the student who studied under him, any other teacher in the town of Pondicherry, or even many others living in Pondicherry. People will unanimously tell you that he is one of the best teachers. People respect him for who he is. His passion for teaching, his care for his students and the power of encouragement and motivation he has, his humility, his dedication makes him so popular and dear among his students.

Was he successful? - I don't know. It depends on what you consider successful. He does not own a Ferrari.
Was he of valve?  - YES !!!
How do I say so? He's a brilliant person. If he'd chosen to be (say) a computer programmer** (just an example), earned millions and lived his way, many would have been deprived of a wonderful teacher.

Now what do we learn here:
- Many people are not satisfied with their profession. They feel unsuccessful in this competitive world. (like a doctor working in a rural centre compared to a doctor working in a corporate hospital). How successful you are doesn't matter when compared how valuable you are.

-A man of value will live in the hearts of people even after his death. A successful person's money will be looted after his death. (I don't mean you shouldn't be successful. In fact, you should. But the priority you have decides your life principles)

To conclude: “Try not to become a man of success rather try to become a man of value.” –Albert Einstein

** I never say that a computer engineer can't be a man of value. It was just an example. You can be a man of value in whichever profession you are, whichever part of the world you live in...etc.

Barfi! - Not a review!

I am not a movie reviewer. I am not a movie critic. I not any of the actor's fan-boy.
(Well, if your internal voicing system came up with "Well, who the hell are you then?", I'm just a blogger @ blogger.com :)

Normally I don't take any initiative to watch a movie. My friends usually call me and book tickets for me. I just go with them. First time ever, slept just one hour after a grueling night shift @ JIPMER, caught a bus to Chennai, watched Barfi! at the Sangam Cinemas and  returned back to Pondy on the same day.
No idea why I did that but I never thought this trip would end up a little life enriching!

The movie Barfi is about how three young people learn that love can neither be defined nor contained by society's norms of normal and abnormal. That was beautifully portrayed using excellent acting talent with minimal dialogues, beautiful screenplay, amazing cinematography & a heart touching storyline.

Bounce back !
Barfi, a deaf mute, lost his mother at birth. You can imagine what a tragic life it would be. In spite of all his negatives, Barfi is always colourful with a smile. You might say this is fiction!!! Wait a minute! There were times when he got totally dejected and lost his temper. He wanted to yell but even a little sound he could never make (like when Shruthi betrayed his love or when Jhilmil kept following him like mad). What did he do? He rapidly came back to his senses put a smile on everyone's face. 

Value people. Especially the ones who value you.
We don't realize the value of someone unless we lose them. It may then be that God deliberately brings minor break ups or tragedy into some of our lives so that we realize our blunted affect and move on with more passion.

Seek higher help!
Whenever some difficult decision was due, Barfi would do something strange. He was probably asking for a sign. He would bring down a lamp post and see if it would hit a bottle he kept in front of it. If it, then he would boldly do ahead with what he had in his mind.

Unexpressed love is worse than Hatred !
Love is not an emotion to be stored in the heart. Of what use it is to have a swollen up heart full of love which is not expressed. And to express it, you don't need words. Love is a verb and what you do matters. From expressing his love to caring for the one he loved, Barfi was full of action.

A good friend makes the life's hard journey bearable.
We couldn't notice Barfi's disability because of two reasons. One was his cheerfulness and presence of mind. The other was his friend's constant support. To write a love letter or a ransom note, his friends put their share.

Choices!
Day to day, me make so many choices either knowingly or unknowingly. But there are some important choices that we need to be very careful about;  made wrongly, it could lead to a life of regrets. Shruthi was way too quick to make a choice which she regretted her whole life. (Ironically she saw her mother regretting a very similar bad choice). It is very important to note that though we can do something later to partly reverse the changes, the consequences can never be fully reverted back.

Disability is a disability when you call it so.
As I said earlier, it was hard to realize that Barfi or Jhilmil was disabled. They never focused on it. I felt they were living their lives one day at a time, enjoying their journey of life.

My Internship FB Updates: Top 10

Below are some of my status updates in Facebook when I was an intern.

Little things I've realised as an INTERN: Part 1
Patient oriented:
1. The morning prick we make when we take blood sometimes keeps paining till evening. So the needle bore, site of puncture should be carefully chosen and done.
2. If patients are informed about why the test has to be done, they are much relieved.
3. Spending 1 min explaining the route to a certain lab/place in the hospital saves their 1 hour of roaming around.
4. I give kids the chest piece of my steth. They themselves keep it on their chest. Less panic :)

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Things I've realised as an INTERN: Part 2
Self Oriented:
1. Many may try to belittle you..from consultants to nurses, wardboys and even patients cos you are just an INTERN. Never lose self-esteem. Be humble. Cos your heart knows what you are becoming...
2. At the end of the day, the  positive influences you'd had on others' lives make you happier than the knowledge gained. But of course, knowledge and skills are needed to bring the best in you for patient care.

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I'd successfully put an IV line for a 10 day old baby on the very FIRST attempt :-):-)    

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Please don't SCARE little children saying "I'll take you to the doctor n he'll give you an injection if you don't...." Children start yelling in fear just as they see me with my steth!! I feel miserable... 

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I'm stuck here in a hard shell...pressure from all sides, life getting harder and harder......But deep down here, I'm metamorphosing....silently and patiently...slowly and steadily.....when I fly out I'll be something beautiful :)

I'm in OG Postings :(

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Whenever I'm posted in any dept. in INTERNSHIP, I do 3 things:-)
1. Feel that the previous dept. was far better
2. Count the days for the current posting to end
3. Look forward for an easy life in the next posting :-P:-P

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I'm Dumbstruck!!
Unfortunately Actinomycin D, a chemotherapeutic drug, is currently not available in JIPMER. A 25 yr old lady, admitted in ward 16, JIPMER, is on chemo regime containing Actinomycin D. She has to buy the drug herself n single dose costs Rs.439.00
She got the first dose with her money. She later confessed to the doctors that she had no money to get other dose.
A group of Junior Residents, OG Unit 2, Jipmer have put their pocket money for her second dose..I was one of them who contributed. :)

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Best moments of life: 
Me & my co-intern were involved in the treatment of a lady diagnosed with PRES (Posterior Reversible Encephalopathy Syndrome) due to severe hypertension. Her BP was very high and her brain was affected. She was disoriented and possibly going into coma. Every 15 min we gave her drugs to bring her BP under control. After around 5-6 hours of aggressive BP control, I'd gone to check in on her. She woke up and spoke to me, "Doctor, can I drink a cup of coffee?"
I had goosebumps !!

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"BUSE for all, BUSE for all
BUSE for all d JR said.."
Not tho' the INTERN knew
Someone had blunder'd:
Theirs not to make reply,
Theirs not to reason why,
Theirs but to do and die:
Into the valley of ignorance
Rode the budding medico.

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MBBS: when it started, it appeared as a very long and tiring road....
now 5 & a half yrs gone, when it's about to end,
I wish to travel that road again with my friends....
It was fun & frolic all the way.....

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